Are You Turning Your Kid Into An Addict?

Sometime back, I visited a friend who had a toddler. The child was crying and throwing a tantrum. It appeared he had been doing this for a while.
When I asked why the child was crying, the father said, "He just won't stop crying until I give him my phone or tablet." I was intrigued so I probed further. I asked how this happened and he explained that when his son was younger, he would let him play with his phone whenever they were both busy or whenever the child got restless. Since it worked, they continued till the point where the only thing that could calm him down was a phone or tablet. Unwittingly, they had created the perfect conditions for an addiction.  This is what happens...

According to a Havard University study, the positive feedback received from using the phone or tablet delivers a shot of dopamine (a pleasure neuro chemical in the brain). Subsequently,  this rewires the brain to crave the phone or tablet like how a cocaine addict craves the next hit. Consequently, not having this rush produces withdrawal symptoms just like that of an addict, although most likely in lower levels. Eventually a cycle is formed where the child is conditioned to crave that feeling so much that, nothing else works.  (Read my article: Are You Addicted to Social Media?

Although technology is important and it is very essential that your child is technologically savvy, an over exposure and unregulated indulgence will produce far more negative effects than positives. The Kaiser Family Foundation estimates that, toddlers are spending an avarage of 7 hours or more staring at screens.  Several studies have shown that this can impede the healthy development of children. Some of the adverse effects are

1. Affects Brain development
An over exposure to gadgets during the development stages may affect brain functioning leading to Addiction, Attention Deficits, Lack Of Self Control or Regulation, Violence, Impulsivity and even impaired learning.

2. Over Exposure to Radiation
According to the 2011 report of the World Health Organization, cellphones and other wireless devices are considered category 2B risk because of their radiation emission. Allowing your child to excessively use gadgets increases their exposure and may cause harm.

3. Damaged Eyesight
Excessive exposure to screens causes eye fatigue, stress and strain. Research shows that children who are addicted to video games are more likely to develop eye problems as they grow up.

4. Sleep Deprivation
Children who become addicted to mobile gadgets miss out on needed sleep or rest time. In other occasions, these gadgets become their sleeping tablets and they may become grumpy and restless without them. Sleep deprivation can affect the child's immunity to common aliments like flu.

5. Obesity
When children get addicted to staring at screens, they spend far less time participating in outdoor and physical activities. This means they don't burn as much calories as they should. A lack of physical activity can lead to obesity which may lead to other complications like diabetes, heart problems etc.

So how do you make sure that your child still gets the benefits of technology but doesn't get exposed to the harmful effects? Here a few ideas

1. Design a Screen time table for your kids and be strict about it.
Instead of just using your phone as a pacifier or crutch because you are busy, be more strict on the use of mobile gadgets. Set up a time limit preferably, an  hour a day (perhaps 2 hours on the weekends) and regulate the type of programs they interact with. Make sure they understand exactly what the phone or tablet is supposed to be used for during their screen time. Make sure screen time is not close to bed time.
Here is a rule of thumb suggested by the American Academy of Paediatrics. 
1. No screen time for children under 18 months
2. 1 hour a day for children between 2 to 5 years
3. A maximum of 2 hours a day for older children.

2. Model healthy screen use.
This is where lots of parents get it wrong. Children are more likely to do WHAT YOU DO instead of WHAT YOU SAY. If you don't make time for off screen activities, you probably won't be able to get your child to do the same. Plan outdoor or alternative activities with your children that allows you build to emotional connections and interact with nature. Include playing board games, spelling games, crafts and physical activities.

3. Monitor for signs of problematic use
Have frequent conversations with your child about what they learn and watch .

4. Limit the number of gadgets and exposure at home.
When buying, focus on usability, educational ability and durability instead of indulging in any new one you see. Put them away to reduce visibility until the appropriate screen time.

Finally, children are very malleable and impressionable and hence can easily be conditioned whether positively or negatively. Technology is a great thing but can become a negative influence if left unregulated or monitored. Pay attention to what you expose your children to and equip them to become the very best of themselves.

PS: I would love to hear your comments, enquires, contributions and questions so don't hesitate to either send them here or email me at tinagyei@gmail.com. 

By
Dr. Samuel Tinagyei
Optometrist, Mental Health Advocate, Certified Professional and Emotional Intelligence Coach, NLP Master Practitioner, Author and Speaker.